Editor's Note: NewsChannel 2 Anchor Wendy Chioji is grateful to all of the viewers who have expressed their best wishes as she wages her fight against breast cancer.
Chioji has chosen to use NewsChannel20000.com as her way of keeping the public updated on her health. New diary entries will be posted every Friday.
Hi everybody.
In less than a week, I'll be finished with chemotherapy.
I mean, I could actually break it down into hours at this point (107 from now, by my count -- I'm writing early this week). I've already started saying good-byes to other patients in Dr. Dave's office. That was odd. Two patients who've been coming every Monday, just like me, are done with their treatments. So they said "See ya later." And that's it. It's strange that we've been sharing such an intimate time in our lives -- surviving potentially fatal diseases -- and then, we just say bye.
There's my friend whom I see every week whose cancer is back, as we feared. She's changing chemotherapy treatments. I feel like I'm leaving her behind. There are these wonderful nurses who are compassionate and efficient and kind, who seem to have endless time and patience for our questions and concerns and fears and next Monday, I'll say, "Thanks" and "See ya." It seems like there should be a bigger climax as this chapter in my life ends. In a movie, there'd at least be a crescendo of music.
Today, I went to the dentist's office for the first time since chemo started. I was so excited to be allowed to do this normal event that I'd put off for months because of a compromised immune system, that I made my appointment for 7 a.m. What was I thinking? But it's a sign that normal life is returning.
Next, I'll make appointments to get touch-ups for the permanent make-up, which I also had to postpone til after the chemo. Soon, I'll also be able to finish the reconstruction, have the port taken out, and maybe get a little tattoo I've been considering. :-)
My new blonde hair is over an inch long now and I have made the discovery that, as I'd dreaded, it appears to have curls. The back, where it's longest, is curling, no matter how much hair sludge I put in. Melinda, the clinical trial nurse, says it should straighten out in a couple of months. I'll be keeping an eye (and an iron, if I have to) on that.
I got an email from my first real boyfriend today (not counting when I was in 4th grade and had a crush on the boy with the long hair who gave me a Dr. Seuss book for my birthday.) It was great to hear from him, but his news was that he is a cancer survivor, too -- testicular cancer, which he had in his mid-30s. Even with all the cancer experiences I've heard from people, I still can be stunned. Luckily, everything sounds good for him. We can't wait to talk on the phone and compare stories!
I've been lucky with avoiding side effects of the Taxotere, but now it's starting to take its toll. I went running with Dr. Dave on Sunday, and my legs felt like I was running through molasses. I was dead on my feet after just a few miles. Also, my eyes are starting to water a little (although that could be from allergies) and I think I had a hot flash. I can't be sure. That is one of the potential side effects, though. It was also one of the reasons I considered not taking Tamoxifen. But if I'm already having hot flashes, then it's no longer a reason to avoid Tamoxifen.
So, what's next? Monday is the last chemo, just in time for me to run with the Olympic torch on Friday and leave for my skiing trip on Saturday. Then, I get a three-week break, before I start Tamoxifen, or I might wait until January. You'll know what I do, though. I've received a couple of e-mails from folks wondering if I am going to stop the diaries any time soon, and the answer is no. I figure I still have lots to say about all kinds of things!
Wendy
Nov. 30, 2001
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